We interrupt this move…
to discuss appropriate behavior by children. If you have school age (or pre-school age) children, please weigh in on this discussion….
Yesterday a friend of my big girl came over to visit. She was here from about 4:30 - 6:30 and I served dinner. The meal consisted of left over soup from shabbat (tomato-vegetable), veggie schnitzel (choice of corn or spinach) and brussel sprouts. (Hey, my kids like them.)
Anyway, the big girl’s friend…lets call her Grumpy (she is about 5 1/2), says I don’t want soup.
me: Fine, which kind of schnitzel do you want?
Grumpy: Can I have cornflakes and milk?
me: No, we don’t have cornflakes here for dinner…what I serve is what you can have
Grumpy: do you have yogurt?
me: No, this is not a restaurant. You can have anything I’ve served. Would you like some bread with butter?
Grumpy: I want humus
me: fine…here is some bread with humus.
(child proceeds to maul bread with fork, while my children have finished their soup and started on their schnitzels)
Grumpy: I’ll have that schnitzel (corn).
Grumpy: Why does it have corn in it?
me: because it is corn schnitzel.
Grumpy: I don’t like it, and I don’t like the soup….let me see what you have in the fridge….
Ok..so I don’t need to give any more details, you get the idea. (oh, and she also wanted mitz (Israeli bug juice) but we only drink water here.)
I’m very conflicted about the situation. Firstly, I don’t think she behaved appropriately, and secondly, if I let her have her way, then I would have been teaching my children a message I really don’t want them to learn. Also, why do Israeli children think it is acceptable to go into someone else’s refrigerator? (This is the second time that one has happened to me.)
I’m not sure that’s an Israeli thing as I have come across kids that are my big girl’s age that behave just like that.
Comment by Aimee — February 6, 2007 @ 1:32 am
No kids here…so by your rules my opinion doesn’t count, but don’t hang Grumpy for a lack of parenting by her folks. Your House/Your Rules..sound simple, but it might be foreign to the little lady in search of Corn Flakes.
Comment by Jay — February 6, 2007 @ 3:29 am
Jay, your opinions always count….even if I don’t agree
Comment by Safranit — February 6, 2007 @ 10:20 am
You did the right thing. Your job is to set the example that you want your children to see. Maybe for next time though, if you know ahead of time that a little friend will be staying for dinner, talk to the kid’s mom first to find out what the kid likes or doesn’t like. Then it’s still your rules, but maybe the kid won’t be so grumpy.
Comment by Liza — February 6, 2007 @ 11:19 am
Offering pita and humus is what I try to do. I wouldn’t feel obligated to offer anything else, and no way to letting her go into the refrigerator. 6:30 is early by Israeli standards so it is no big deal if she eats at home.
Comment by mominisrael — February 6, 2007 @ 10:05 pm
Gaaaah! Yes, you’ve finally met them - badly-behaved Israeli kids. When we came back here, it was quite awful to remember that some folks will let their kids do, well, everything - including breaking things in your house while supervised. Hmmmmf.
The funny thing is that, in the US, we were invited to this Hannukkah party, which was turned, by six or seven small kids, into a total nightmare, and I asked myself whether this was the American Academic Yuppie education philosophy, or something their folks brought from Israel. I guess it was the latter.
Comment by Hadar — February 7, 2007 @ 8:10 am
Interesting. I agree with one of the other posters - i would find out in advance if Grumpy were staying, and what she liked, and attempt to have something available. Otherwise, I think you behaved as I would.
But what do I know. I’m just a polite Canadian!
Comment by Naomi (Urban Mummy) — March 4, 2007 @ 6:13 am